I was flooded with more emotion than my little ten year old heart knew what to do with. I came to a page where my Mom and Dad each had written the baby version of me a letter. (I was a sucker for the written word even at ten…) My eyes welled up with tears as I read their words.
Love leapt off the page and covered me.
The other emotion I distinctly remember feeling was sadness. I was sad that time had gone so quickly. And that life was passing me by and I couldn’t slow it down. I didn’t want to miss any bit of it. (Um, mind you I was TEN)
By this time I was ugly crying. (Side note: I have ALWAYS been an ugly crier. Those of you who can shed tears and not look like your face has taken a beating really have it good.)
All of that to tell you that one of my greatest fears is that in the hectic pace of life I will miss the moments. That time will pass and all I’ll have to show for it are a bunch of semi-complete to-do lists.
Which is why on Christmas Eve, a day that is going to be crazy around here, I had to document the conversation I just had with my three-year old.
We are sitting on the couch watching a Leap Frog show together. You need to know that the main characters are “Tad” and “Lily”
Him: Mom, do you want to be Lily?
Me: (took me a second for the question to register, its 6:30am) Um, sure. Who do you want to be?
Him: I will be Tad.
Me: Okay Tad.
Him: Lily, guess what?
Me: What Tad?
Him: Lily, I love you.
Me: (laughing out loud with tears in my eyes) Jackson, you are so awesome.
Him: No. I am Tad.
Me: Oh, right. Tad, you are awesome. I love you too.
Him: Thanks Lily.
He reached over and grabbed by hand and we just sat there watching the show, holding hands, Tad and Lily.
Moments like this make my life.
UPDATE: It is now 7:58 and I’m still Lily. I get scolded every time I call him by any other name than Tad. LOL.